Please be advised that the content on these pages is STATIC and for archival purposes only. Links may not work.
Monday, May 2, 2005 10:18:00a: Good Morning, KOS-MOS*
It's a bit unnerving to look at this screen now. I mean, the blog system now does 80% of what I want it to. I just need to tweak the display setup and add in editing capabilities-- but since I was planning on those from the very beginning, it'll be easier.
Oh, and, hello. Again.
I want to go ahead and re-insert the old blog entries from Wordpress, but I'm not sure how or when I'll do that. Well, I know how... I just don't know when. Maybe later. It's a hassle, to be sure, but it's probably going to be worth it.
Anyway, with this done I'm well on my way to getting a good portion of the site's content back up. Also, I've figured out how to do the multiple layout thing, so real soon now you'll be able to pick among several different layouts for the page-- the old style sadly will not be among them, but I intend to change the top portion of the layout so that it's less egomaniacal per page. I mean, really, was it strictly necessary for me to put a gigantic "TEHFURI1" at the top of every single page? (hint: the answer is 'no')
For now, I'm going to go eat breakfast and get a shower, and then make some calls. Thanks again to everyone who stuck by me through all of this. Regular blog-like updates should resume soon, I promise.Tuesday, May 3, 2005 10:10:00p: The Infinite Telomerase*
I mentioned this in the Netjak forums, but it deserves a more permanent remark here. This evening I caught an advertisement for NBC's Biblical stinker Revelations. Now ordinarily I would have tuned the whole damn thing out, given that a) I've had quite enough study of the so-called "Greatest Story Ever Told's Final Chapter" during my middle-school days, when I took it upon myself to read everything I could get my hands on about the End of Days; this study was ended when our Sunday-school teacher revealed himself to be far more hardcore about the whole Armageddon thing than I had ever hoped to be, and b) these days I tend to think of the world as being more or less stable until some nut in East Armpitistan finds the last hidden cache of Mother Russia's atomic bounty. Like I said, I would have given Revelations a miss if it wasn't for a very familiar, haunting, and slightly unnerving melody that opened up the commercial. Apparently, the Apocalypse will be triggered by Albedo, because the commercial had the Song of Nephilim (from Xenosaga) as its background music.
Kinda pointless, I know, but worth mentioning. Anyway. I'll resume work on the site bright and early tomorrow morning, as today I realized I had no clothes and no food. I spent most of today rectifying these things. While my nudity would have little effect on whether or not the site got done, my hunger does have a bit of an impact on it; and to be brutally, sickeningly honest I think I might just start up the webcam again, so nudity = bad there.
G'night, folks.Wednesday, May 4, 2005 8:15:00a: *
Oh yeah, I want this shirt.Friday, May 6, 2005 10:06:00p: *
Some progress on the site-- I got the links page working again, so that's one less headache I'll have to deal with as time goes by. I was getting mighty sick of having them all in the bookmarks bar, y'know? Plus, I'm egomaniacal enough to think that people care what sites I visit. I added a couple more and took out a couple, so if you actually do care, well, have fun. Actually, I only did the links page tonight because I was procrastinating on finishing the blog functions-- that is, securing the "write entry" page and figuring out an archive scheme. I'll probably be doing those tomorrow.
To tell you the truth I decided to do the links page now because I wanted to do it right. Rather than reload the page and incur massive time/load penalties for that, I decided it was better to load all of the link panels at once and then just use CSS and Javascript to show or hide them as needed. There is the drawback of Javascript-incapable browsers not being able to see the links; but then again if you don't support Javascript, you probably don't support CSS either, and as a result you see everything anyway, just not in any sort of order. Hm. There's probably a way to fix it, I just don't care. I figured out a nifty way to do the link sorting with just one SQL query. Go me.
I also spent a good half-hour trying to figure out why the forums were telling me I wasn't up to date. It may have had something to do with the whole "Install PHPBB 2.0.14, then install the 2.0.4 database on top of it and royally confuse the system" thing I did to restore the forums. In any event, if you have a problem with the forums now, let me know via e-mail. One last thing-- I'm actively going to police forum accounts which are set up for spamming. If I don't know you, you had better start posting good reasons for me to not delete your account.
Next mission: First And Last 2.0. Bigger, badder, and just plain more full of that down-home syllabic goodness that you've come to know and love from F&L, but with some new twists. Here's a hint-- the past won't repeat. G'night, folks.Saturday, May 7, 2005 9:30:00a: *
Oh yeah, as long as I'm thinkin' about it, I'd like to take this opportunity to announce my first nonfiction book, currently being written:
Fur Is Murder (But Meat Is Tasty): Unleashing Your Inner Corporate Whore
I expect it on shelves next Febtober.Saturday, May 7, 2005 10:35:00p: *
This news just in: Wild ARMS: Alter Code F has been officially delayed until August. In a related story, I am now going to hunt something down and kill it; I don't even care what, something has to die for this.
Oh, and I finished Musashi: Samurai Legend a little while ago. Overall a very "meh" game. But damn pretty.
I might actually do coding work ont he site tomorrow. Imagine that.Sunday, May 8, 2005 8:25:00p: Somnambulating*
I've added the old blog entries to the system. Tomorrow I'll work on getting an archive page together and actually finishing the blog system. After that, First And Last.
Also, I don't know how long they've done this, but animemusicvideos.org has opened their local downloads to anyone. My donation expired last month but I still managed to get the awe-inspiring AniMix Project (a one-hour AMV). Yeah, that one's not going to be AMV of the Month. Ever.
Slip suggested I mention this, so here goes: If you're just bopping along and are new to the site, please don't register for the forums in the hopes of getting into "Inner Circle" or any of the other forums. You won't. Inner Circle is by invitation only. Registration only entitles you to post. That's it. Any other privilege, you must earn.
Later, folks.Monday, May 9, 2005 5:48:00p: *
Well, I finished the Dragonlance Legends trilogy today. Only took me a year. Part of me thinks that that four hours could have been put to better use than reading, but then again I'd done grocery shopping, coding work, and job searching before I sat down to read. I think I could be entitled a little leeway.
I haven't yet finished the blog, but I intend to tonight. After dinner. I mean it this time. Most of the hard work has been done already, so all that really remains is fixing the archives a little bit (and guess what, I've got a plan for that) and setting up the edit entries facility. You'll note, with some surprise, that the "Recent Forum" bit up there actually updates itself every ten minutes now. It had been a trial to get them to set up the cron job, and I had sort of expected an answer when it didn't work. Ah well, it works now; I had done some phenomenally dumb things when coding it, and fixing the blog gave me the insight I needed to fix the script.
Mmmmmm. It seems I will never be able to make, eat, or enjoy stew again without thinking of Samwise Gamgee enunciating, in no uncertain syllables, the virtues of spuds ("taters... PO-TAY-TOES") to an unwitting Smeagol. Subsequently, whatever meat exists in the stew is now, by default, rabbit. Despite the wrapper in my trash can which says "BEEF".
I haven't forgotten my promise of readying First and Last. Given that I've been on a coding streak these past couple days, I expect it will be done before the end of the week.
Next week is my birthday, which means one thing for me-- I failed in my challenge. I told you folks that I had hoped to finish the rough draft of my novel's manuscript before I turned 25, but life conspired to get in the way. I still intend to finish it-- I've put a lot of thought into the plot and would hate to cast it aside-- but it will have to wait; first until after the site is restored, and secondly until after I'm employed. I'm shooting to have the first draft finished before the next NaNo starts in November, as that will give me time to do a new story, and give me a chance to put some editorial-type distance between myself and the current one so as to sharpen a second draft. I'm just past 35,000 words, and 50,000 is not going to be enough to finish the story-- I'm now looking at maybe 70 to 80,000 as a final length.
I've done a lot of thinking, and I'm currently debating whether or not I should apply to the newly-relaunched Next Generation Magazine site. I have a little experience under my belt, true, but not nearly enough to warrant calling myself a professional game reviewer. I only consider myself a professional web designer because, semantically, I am-- I am a web designer, and that is the profession by which I supposedly earn a living. The only thing I consider myself a true professional at, in all honesty and humility, is the art of bullshit. I can spin forth copious amounts of B.S. and flummox almost anyone I choose to. Fortunately, I don't choose to exercise this skill very often, as it tends to destroy credibility-- something I so desperately need. So it's a bit of a mixed bag-- I'd love to get the opportunity to work for Next Gen, but I would hate to make the NetJak folks think I'm ditching them. I can't write for both-- the whole "can't serve two masters" deal-- but I should think about it a bit more carefully.
Later, folks. Dinner is over, I need a drink and then I'll be workin' on the site.Wednesday, May 11, 2005 8:07:00a: *
Good morning, folks. Little bit to cover here.
First, eagle-eyed readers will note with some satisfaction that the Dynamic Toys page is now up and running, with two entries-- the Weapon of CX and First & Last. It took me several months to get First and Last perfected the last time I did it. Version 2.0 was done in about five hours, runs faster, and is quite improved. That either says something about Perl or says something about my coding skills; I'm not sure what, but I'd put my money on Perl.
I decided to classify the Dynamic Toys under "Magic" in the status screen layout because, to the average reader, their workings will be magic. Also, if and when I do create a standalone game, I'll probably put that under "Equipment". 'Course, this is all moot as my goal for today is to create a layout that's not a big metaphor, but meh.
Hm. There're free tools which will turn Perl files into Windows executables. Coupled with Perl's support for Tk (a GUI toolkit), I'll bet I can make Windows games faster than ever before. I just hate working with XP-tan-- she and I have had a very abusive relationship in the past and my dabbling with Linux-tan has obviously upset her. Wow, it's been three years since I made that one short and horrible VB game. Still, I'd like to code something. Maybe I'll start small, with a dice game or something.
In the meantime, Eyeglazer got me hooked on a side-scrolling amusement called Cave Story-- check it out here. So I'm off to play that.Saturday, May 14, 2005 10:04:00a: Discotheque*
Good morning, folks. I've got some stuff to cover here, so I'll get right into it. First, however, I'd like to extend my thanks to everyone who's stuck with me over these past few years of trouble. Things have been rocky for me, and I've needed a lot of help, but hopefully my life will turn around soon. It's important for me to keep a hopeful attitude going into my birthday, otherwise I might just decide that twenty-five was a good run and I should just quit. We'll see, but rest assured I won't do anything rash.
Anyway, game news. First off, Square music is available on iTunes now, so that's a plus. Myself, I've got most of the tracks I really wanted-- legally or otherwise-- so it's not as much of a draw as it would have been, say, two years ago. Secondly, well, given that I've said it's my birthday coming up, that means My Birthday Party is also coming up-- E3 starts on Wednesday, so that means lots and lots of new promises and more old ones.
Nintendo revealed some interesting specs regarding their Revolution, but at this point I'm not willing to even put them down as "rumored". The size is given as being just over that of the slimmed PS2, or about three DVD cases stacked flat. I dunno about you but that's damn tiny. I thought the 'Cube was small, but hey, to each their own. The Revolution is rumored to have backwards-compatibility with the Cube and will take full-size dual-layer DVD media. Ostensibly this means that the Revolution will have some funky disc format for its software. You know what, I'm starting to think of the Revolution less and less as Nintendo's next-gen machine and more and more of it as "GameCube 2.0". That's really off-putting as I thought the Cube was a good machine, just a bit under-developed-for. Big N has said that the Revolution won't concentrate on flashier graphics as much as it will new innovations in gameplay-- believe me, it's perfectly founded for N to make that kind of remark about the graphics as the Cube is easily the nicest-looking of all the current-generation machines. The problem is one of timing.
Microsoft announced that the Xbox 360 will hit stores this Thanksgiving. Sony is saying that the PS3 will be sometime in 2006. This is too early! There hasn't been sufficient development in consoles to warrant a new generation. Prior to this, each generation was a radical step forward in technology-- SNES to Playstation, PSX to GameCube-- and the intermediate steps (TG-16, Saturn, Dreamcast) have always failed. The XB360, PS3, and Revolution are all just baby steps towards a new generation; none of them have (out in the open, anyway) anything that screams "This is new! Never been done before EVER!" I'll admit I'm a little wary, after getting burned by the DC's abrupt pullout, about adopting any new platform that doesn't have something going for it. XB360 looks like it's not even going to be worth a second look, to me, anyway. And right now I might not even be able to justify continued examination of the Revolution or PS3.
Part of me hears my mother in all of that-- that I've "outgrown" gaming at large. I don't want to think that, as quite frankly that's just not possible. There're the old games I love, and those will suit me just fine. The problem is that the companies are losing sight of what made the games fun to begin with. To date, no game has gripped me as wholly and as fully as Chrono Trigger did, and no game has ever been as expansive and all-encompassing as Final Fantasy VI. I don't think I've been compelled to replay a game since maybe Wild ARMs, and even then it was just a passing thing until the game crashed on me (then when the feeling returned, my PS2 wouldn't read the disc... but that's another story). Some titles come very, very close to having that magic-- Katamari Damacy, Rez, and the Bemani games-- but there's still a lot of crap out there that I play through and wonder, "How could something this god-awful escape from [insert formerly-trusted game company here]?" We're losing a lot of faith in the companies, too-- remember when Sega wasn't actively sabotaging their franchises? Remember when Capcom could be counted on for a solid Mega Man game every year or so? Remember when EA wasn't The Great Satan? It's just getting to a point where the gaming industry at large is a shadow of its former self, and the old franchises are mockeries of what made them good to begin with.
So, I suppose if I had to compile a wish list for my birthday, I guess it would be something like this. I'm not saying "buy me games", here, I'm saying "promise me, companies, that you'll at least try to make an effort towards these things":
Capcom, I'd like you guys to ramp up development on the next Breath of Fire. BOF: Dragon Quarter was an interesting trip, true, but come on. You guys have a story-telling franchise to rival some of the minor players in the RPG franchises and you decided to make a dungeon-crawl. I'd call that squandered resources, myself. You have the resources to make a cinematic, glorious experience with a solid gameplay mechanic. Get the Viewtiful Joe guys to handle graphics, get the Mega Man guys to handle gameplay mechanics, and get the US teams to handle the story and voicework-- well, all right, I'd strongly suggest outsourcing the voicework to Bang Zoom! or Synch-Point. Oh, speaking of the Blue Bomber, is it too much to ask that you guys get on a new old-school Mega Man game, or at the very least put together another sequel to Mega Man Legends? Not all of us like the X series and some of us felt downright insulted with the .EXE series. Oh yeah, how about giving him a consistent name? If Sega gan give up on "Dr. Robotnik" I'm sure the hardcore gamers in Japan wouldn't mind him being called Mega Man.
Konami, you guys have a good thing going in the United States, now that Bemani is starting to take off. I'm not saying let up on Roxorgames or anything like that-- business is business, and there's an answer in there that I in my not-lawyerness can't instantly find. What I am saying is that if you want to protect the ideas behind Bemani in the US, you have to actually publish them here. Yeah, a short and failed attempt in the late 90's doesn't really count. You need to be on it and you need to stay on it, otherwise the knockoffs win and the gamers lose. For Christ's sake you even mentioned DDR Freak in your lawsuit! Can you be that blind to the fact that the gamers want Bemani and have been going to extraordinary lengths to get it? If we're willing to pay nearly twice the price to an importer, then you bet your bottom that we'll pay reasonable prices from a direct-market store, similar to the Konamistyle setup you've been working in Japan for a while now. Anyway, moving on, you might also want to consider getting back to doing licensed games. Say what you will, but you guys handled licenses probably the best in the old days-- and there's no real shame in it anymore, not since Riddick. Do a license up right and you'll be back on the gravy train, gravy which we'd appreciate ladling ontop the Bemani pile. One last thing-- we'd all, that is, the DDR Erie crew, like to know when the next Karaoke Revolution mix is coming out. Call it a guilty pleasure.
EA, you already know most of what I'm going to say, but it bears repeating. Open more offices, plan your projects out better, expand your human resources instead of expending them. For the love of all that is holy, there's a shortage of jobs! People would gladly and repeatedly kill for even the chance to send a resume in! If you litter development houses across the country I swear to high heaven you'll single-handedly buoy up the employment rate and maybe even save the damn economy. Heck, I'll work for you. I'll swallow my pride, say all is forgiven, and give you a fair shot if you open a dev house in Pennsylvania. "Planning your projects better" isn't just a matter of being honest about deadlines, though. It's a matter of saying, "All right, here's the market research which says we're not delivering what people want. Do we listen to our customers and make changes, thereby delaying a game by several weeks, or do we say 'damn the torpedoes' and just release this buggy piece of garbage that we were just told will not sell?" Think of it this way-- Working Designs didn't go into the poorhouse by delaying the Lunar games. Do it right or do it fast is not a choice that needs to be made-- you do it once and you do it right, otherwise you don't get a second chance, no matter how much money you have.
Sega, you're already on my short list for Sonic Heroes. Great idea in concept, but an atrocity in execution. What posessed you to think developing for multi-platforms would do anything but lower the average quality of the game? And given that you knew damn well people wanted to play as Sonic and Sonic alone, not only did you force everyone to drag their ass as goddamn Vector the Crocodile, not only did you purposefully make Amy faster than Tails and Knuckles slower than shit, not only did you ignore Nack the Weasel, you're not even repentant because the next game in the continuity stars bloody Shadow the Hedgehog. With a gun. RRRRGH. Look, I'm older and wiser now. I know that the Archie continuity isn't going to hit the digital realm. But can you at least try to remember why people play Sonic games? Can you read the title of the franchise and give us that, just once before the end of the GameCube? If you're not going to do that, then how about picking up some older titles and dusting them off? You get a small goodie for the new Phantasy Star, but how about a new Streets of Rage (Bare Knuckle)?
I'm going to lump these next couple together, as they're all guilty of the same things. Mastiff, Atlus, Agetec, and Sammy, you're all in deep with me. Mastiff already knows what I think about Technic Beat, but it bears mention here-- don't you dare pull a stunt like that again. Atlus is in hot water for not continuing a couple franchises-- a re-issue of Tactics Ogre wouldn't kill you, would it? Well, maybe, I mean it's a Quest game and they're now owned by S-E, so... Agetec-- Wild ARMs. Cough it up already or I'll show you what a Metal Demon can really do. And Sammy, what were you thinking with Guilty Gear Isuka? The basic thing tying these guys together is a lack of commitment to finishing what they started. Mastiff promised us the best that Japan had to offer, Atlus promised to introduce us to new and interesting tales, Agetec just plain promised Wild ARMs, and Sammy promised more of what made Guilty Gear XX good. All of these fell by the wayside, which is a shame. So next week, you better have some good news for us.
Finally, Nintendo. Part of what I had to say about EA rings true for you-- we want more. People love your games, people want more of your games... let us make your games! Open development houses in the US, sponsor new and upcoming projects with the Nintendo vision and spirit. If you want to dominate with the Revolution, then you've got to spend some cash on games. Let US houses update some of your old franchises-- all right, I'll grant that Star Fox Adventures was a mistake, but look how well Metroid Prime did. Let us do that for the stuff from the heyday! Give a developer a book full of the old IP and let them just run wild. Better yet-- let us, the gamers, run wild. An open dev kit with pre-made, identifiable IP, and let us load it onto the DS via wi-fi. I guarantee, you do that for us, you'll be inundated with good ideas. You'll also open the floodgates for crap, but there will be a high signal-to-noise ratio, mark my words.
What I guess my birthday wish comes out to be, really, is that companies start realizing the need for more development houses. Sure, you'll get a lot of bad games, but you'll also get a decent selection of fresh ideas and new thinkers. If you want to revolutionize gaming, put it in the hands of the people.Monday, May 16, 2005 10:24:00p: 誕生日 おめでとう*
It's over now, of course, but today was my birthday. I can't say I did much different than I did last year-- except for the whole dinner with the parents thing. Oh, and the "I horribly embarassed myself by violating a Chinese buffet the night before" thing, too. But for the most part, I just did what I did last year.
That's bad 'cause last year my birthday was on a Sunday and this year it was a Monday, and Monday is not exactly known for allowing young men of my age to sit around playing video games.
Anyway, I spent a bit of time today talking on the phone, sometimes to my relatives, sometimes to Verizon tech support who don't seem to comprehend the fact that maybe, just maybe, I'm telling the truth when I say my DSL is slow. I also went out and paid bills, something I kinda wish I didn't have to do; but until the royalties start rolling in on my old Usenet posts I don't think I can quit job hunting just yet. On the bright side, I did get a call from a new recruiter contact.
Anyway. I just felt like maybe today's the calm before the storm. This week has lots of good things happening-- namely, E3 and Revenge of the Sith-- so it helps me to just think that today was an ordinary day, not unlike any other, and that my real party-- the one in Los Angeles-- will have lots of stuff to thrill and enthrall me. I think I can get behind that.
Well, some business to take care of. Dom is going to be on Jeopardy, so best of luck to him there. PErsonally I've always wanted to get on The Price Is Right. Sure, I'd do better on Jeopardy, but-- and you can feel free to call me a little old lady for this-- I really want to spin the big wheel. That or be up on stage when the announcer shouts, "ANEWCAR!!!11one!" Either one will be fine by me.
Young Wang is also celebrating today, which reminds me-- I've yet to offer my wishes to him. ...done. Better late than never. I'd send to Janet, but I know it would be returned-- Ms. Jackson thinks I'm nasty. There's no point sending to Pierce, he's contractually restricted from wearing a tuxedo to the party. And forget about Tori, she'd just whore up the place. But thanks always to John, Sammy, and Andy. Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end, guys. Thanks, and we miss you.
Not much else to say tonight. I'll be in touch if something interesting comes up tomorrow.Tuesday, May 17, 2005 8:00:00p: *
A visit with Pez has given me a refreshed outlook, and a new purpose. The next project for the site is going to be a text adventure.
And the system I'm going to develop to run the game will be called SeeD.Tuesday, May 17, 2005 11:42:00p: Best. Birthday. EVER.*
Beatmania. .hack//GU. 3 New DDRs. Kingdom Hearts II. Lunar Genesis. MGS3: Subsistence and MGS4. Sonic Rush. Phantasy Star Universe. Radiata Stories. Sonic Gems. Unreal Tournament 2K7. We Love Katamari. THE LIST GOES ON...Friday, May 20, 2005 4:35:00p: So. How 'bout that E3?*
There's been quite a bit of news regarding E3 and all that, so I suppose I ought to start with a more coherent look at what had me in a giddy lunatic high all week. Specifically, everything that came out of Konami's booth.
The first and truly epic news, of course, was the announcement of Beatmania for the US PS2. This comes as a bit of a hybrid release for us-- the original Beatmania series was splintered off in Japan into the regular and the "IIDX" versions. Regular Beatmania (which had only eight arcade mixes) had five keys plus the turntable, while IIDX (on I think its eleventh arcade mix) has seven plus the turntable. The US release will see both versions melded into one package, doing away with the IIDX sub-moniker. The biggest thing about it is that songs will be available for only one mode or the other-- none of the songs have multiple beatcharts. What is also unusual is that Konami is only advertising roughly 50 songs on the disc-- while that still comes out to "over 100 minutes of music", it just sounds like less than the tracklists for DDR. I am sure that the details surrounding Beatmania will become clearer as time wears on, as inside sources claim the current version was a hastily-slapped-together hack job done only to placate fans. It worked; a great collective mental orgasm was had by many once news of the game became official. Ditto for the showings of DDR Extreme 2, DDR Ultramix 3, and DDR With Mario. Oh, and a new Pop'n Music has made its way to location-testing in Japan! Konami enjoys dropping bombs every May and these ones were well received.
Speaking of bombs, let's get away from Bemani to talk about the new Metal Gears. First, there's the announcement that MGS4 is in planning-- it's still in the pre-development stage, that's how early they want us to know that Snake will go on. Then Konami announces MGS3: Subsistence, a "remix" of the awe-inspiring Snake Eater which will include extras such as enhanced difficulty, multiplayer, and the original MSX versions of Metal Gear and MG2: Solid Snake. All I really know about MG2 is that it has a kick-ass proto-techno track called "Theme of Snake" which I have an incomplete MP3 of and would kill to hear in context. I'll be picking up Subsistence primarily because I want a copy of MGS3 for the archive, but also because I want the MSX games.
So, that essentially means that of the wishes I expressed on the 14th, Konami has delivered on nearly all of them. Trippy. Let's see how the other companies fared, hm?
Capcom announced a slew of Mega Man titles, but not one of them hit the original series or Dash/Legends series. A shame. They also neglected Breath of Fire. Come to think of it, short of "Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney" and maybe Classics Collection, you guys brought nothing to the table to entice me. Why have you forsaken me!
(Incidentally, I got my history a bit muddled with the Mega Man->Rockman/Robotnik ->Eggman thing, and Slip called me on it. It's largely irrelevant, though, as you don't really want to ruin a series' continuity like that.)
The EA juggernaut came with absolutely no surprises. I'm starting to form the opinion that these guys just dusted off last year's booth. Anything good I might have had to say about you, I retract. Come up with new ideas, something fresh, or die.
Sega... wow. I have mixed feelings about this. Yeah, you went ahead and showed Shadow the Hedgehog, but then you showed Sonic Rush and Sonic Gems. You also delivered on the older properties (kinda) with Super Gunstar Heroes and Virtua Tennis. But there ain't much else, is there? Phantasy Star and Shining Force Neo... and that's about it. Come on! What happened to the days when Sega had eleventy-billion subdepartments all working on nine games at once?
Agetec showed RPG Maker 3 and two new Armored Core games but not Wild ARMs. HATE. Atlus showed Trauma Center and Snowboard Kids DS, which redeemed them in my eyes. Mastiff showed Top Gun for DS, and nothing else; if it bombs, they won't be at next year's E3. And Sammy was absent entirely. Not so good. Majesco seems to be handling distribution of the Guilty Gear games, though, which from initial reports look to continue the mistakes made in Isuka. There might be some flawed logic there.
Nintendo remained pretty enigmatic. They made overtures at Sony and MS regarding the Revolution, and they announced wi-fi for the DS and a new Game Boy Advance. That makes, what, the fifth iteration of the GBA hardware in as many years? We've got the original GBA from '01, the SP from '02, the GBA Player from '03, the DS from '05, and now the Game Boy Micro in '05. Give it up already, and move on to makin' games for the hardware! Zelda: Twilight Princess looked purty, and I'm always up for a new Kirby adventure. Odama's been hyped for long enough, let's play the damn thing; ditto for Nintendogs and Metroid Prime: Hunters. Hearing about a new old-school Super Mario Bros. was a plus, and you can't go wrong with two new Advance Wars games (the Cube version being renamed to Batallion Wars). I kinda think that my first console purchase, once employment happens, will be a DS just in anticipation of what's been shown.
I touched briefly on Namco, but I had no idea they were diving into License Land head-first. Any work that takes manpower away from a Dead to Rights game is fine by me, though. Super Pac-Man Pinball is an idea whose time has come, and gone (1983), and then come again. Call me an old fart but I love pinball. Put a pinball minigame into We Love Katamari and I may never leave my couch again.
One of these days I'll get around to reviewing the copy of Splinter Cell I have on my cell phone. The developer, Gameloft, did an excellent job with it and I've killed many a Movietunes-induced coma playing it in filling theaters. I'm interested to see if the other games in their series are worth playing, but I still have three missions left before I think about layin' down the cash.
How could I get away without talking about Square-Enix? The FF7 media blitz was in full force, and things are looking up for Advent Children and Dirge of Cerberus. We're looking at maybe September 14th for the movie, and Vincent's Quest To Kick Ass isn't yet set in stone. The producer says he's influenced by Half-Life, and that the game should be shown in a more complete form at TGS later this summer. Vince has traded in the Death Penalty for the tri-barreled Cerberus. What he does with it is anyone's guess at this point, but I'll be disappointed if he doesn't put at least one round into Cait Sith's damn big moogle. By the by, for what it's worth-- Auron does indeed kick ass in Kingdom Hearts II. Just thought you might like to know.
Come to think of it, short of a new .hack game (wherein GU probably does not stand for Gannon University), Unreal Tournament 2K7, and Meteos, there weren't many other suprises this year. Let's see how this all plays out. Next stop: Tokyo Game Show.Saturday, May 21, 2005 9:58:00a: *
A few last-minute E3 bits for you. Square Enix announced in a post-show conference that The World Of Mana will receive the same "polymorphic content" treatment (in English, this means "media blitz") as other titles (Fullmetal Alchemist). It's kind of funny, but the absence of news on both FFXII and World of Mana made me even more excited for these games. I've been thinking a lot about what Final Fantasy needed and a change to the core gameplay was tops on my list. FFXI is a good start but to bring the series closer to a revolution, we'll have to see how well XII handles the turn-based tactical bits. I am also a huge sucker for all things Mana and firmly believe with all of my heart that remakes of Secret of Mana and Seiken Densetsu 3 are in the works. Probably for the GBA, if I had to venture a guess, but you know what? How surprised would you really be if it turned out to be for the DS?
Gamespot has a discussion regarding the future pricing war that will ensue in late '06 between Microsoft and Sony as it pertains to the next-gen hardware. The analyst, I think, is retarded. Sony may have put themselves in a bad spot by saying that the PS3 is going to cost a bundle, but the whole world is still very mum on the concept of the actual software titles' prices. So here's a prediction for the pricing war that doesn't come from someone who has to be told what to wear in the morning: Sony releases the PS3 at the price point of 9 and software titles at a price point of .99. When that happens, MS will have little choice but to bump up their game prices to .99-- let's face it, it's inevitable for all of the next-gen titles. Halo 3 is a non-issue because MS will make sure it's the only big thing opening up that week, while Sony will probably have two or three strong launch titles. Sony has a better chance in the long run, though, because they have more established franchises. MS has... Halo. That's about it. And dude? Did you even bloody listen to the Revolution's features? It is correcting the mistakes that the GC made, there are established mature franchises getting expanded, and they have held on to third place in a market which traditionally believed that third-place folds. When you can hang around in third place after two generations of third-place hardware, I think it's safe to say there's room enough in this town for the three of them. What has been killing Nintendo is the lack of third-party support. But to be honest, it's an overabundance of first-party support which is doing that. Nintendo makes too damn many games and that worries third-party publishers. This helps a little bit-- they'll have a strong launch lineup-- but in the long run Nintendo needs to sit back and focus its efforts into its franchises, old and new (actually, more heavily on the new).
Finally, Gamespot's snarky exhibition of the Kentia Hall objets du lunacie certainly satisfies, much like a hearty bowl of stew. (All right, I'll stop trying to be Tycho now. I promise.) I admit a couple of the items on display do interest me-- wait, no, I won't admit it. You'll just have to guess which ones. As for me, that stew comment made me hungry. Ergo, concordantly, vis-a-vis and suchlike (God dammit, now I'm channeling Will Ferrel, who needs to die SO badly), I'm going to get breakfast.Tuesday, May 24, 2005 7:36:00a: *
Heading down to Sharon today. I expect to be back tonight but make no guarantees. My new Apollo 440 album will make me happy either way. Now if I could only track down "1234 (Punk Wars)"-- I'm talking to you, Jonny.
Also I'm going to shut down my DSL modem in the vain hopes that maybe, just maybe, Verizon will fix whatever problem they said they didn't have which was causing slow service. Pffft, yeah, right.Wednesday, May 25, 2005 5:25:00p: *
Hey. Back from Sharon-- actually, I got in last night-- and things have pretty much remained at status quo. Which sucks.
Well, all right-- maybe not status quo, per se. Slightly above status quo. I'm not really at liberty to discuss particulars-- not even in Inner Circle, just yet. Let me put it this way, I may have to do serious, professional work soon in one of my chosen vocations. It's literally now or never.
Work on plotting out the game has progressed nicely, aided significantly by the writing manuals I picked up yesterday. I may make this week's quota in the Hall of Mediocrity. Which would be good 'cause I just remembered I have a review of Wild ARMs that's about eight years overdue and I'm running short of games to review for Netjak anyway. I'm thinking next week will be a Netjak/novel work week. Anyway, just four more characters to delineate in the story. I might make a forum thread to introduce the first part of the crew.
Incidentally, whoever thought chocolate-covered pretzels were a good idea deserves to die a slow and horrible death. On a similar vein, I hate my left hand for not being as good as my right whilst controlling a mouse. Makes dual-system setups a bit tricky to control, y'see. ANYWAY.
So NCIS ended with a bang last night, literally. I don't know why I've taken to watching the forensics procedurals that litter the CBS viewscape of late, but they provide me with small amounts of comfort in these hard times. Namely 'cause I liked Kate and Jethro's bantering, and I enjoy the fact that Gil delights more in bugs than in people. Still, the CSI finale last week was creepy as... uh, all hell. (In person I am willing to use a stronger, more 'f'-laden phrasology of endearment, but given my promise for this website I will demur from using it here. The word I'm thinking of is a vulgar mutation of one describing the combination and numbering of Reed and Susan Richards, Johnny Storm, and Ben Grimm. Draw your conclusions from there. By the way, the trailer for that movie looked like it's indicating the "peak" in the Marvel movies trend.)
I did get a hearty laugh out of re-watching the SNL "Celebrity Jeopardy" skits, even though my hatred for Will Ferrell continues unabated. Actually, now I know why I hate him so: He has the talent to excel with well-written material, he's just too damn stupid to know what's well-written and what's not. Case in point: "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" versus "Old School".
I've got work to do, folks, and stuff to handle. We'll see how this works out.Sunday, May 29, 2005 9:19:00a: The Return Of Disturbing Search String Theater*
I haven't done this in a long time, owing to the fact that the old web interface was crap, but now I'm proud (well, sort of) to present to you a sampling of the more odd things that people are searching and inexplicably being led to my site for:
mega man fanfiction mature Please god no.
city of heroes who put the bomp ...in the bomp she-bomp she-bomp? None other than Greaserman, defender of 50's pompadours and late-night runs to the hamburger stand!
specifically want to hear snake eater from mgs3 Well, thanks for being specific. I'm glad you don't want to hear, say, "Snake Eater" from "The War Of The Roses", or maybe "Head Like a Hole" from MGS3.
whore games for game cube Again, just no.
naked walk Y'know, I heard this might have been a skit they aired just once on the German-language version of Monty Python.
can you show me japan game that are english like gunbound Why yes. Yes I can.
trent reznor republican democrat Uh, yeah. Rob Zombie Whig Federalist to you too, buddy!
disgaea on a monday lyrics If it's Tuesday, though, this must be Ivalice, whether Vin Diesel believes it or not.
And finally,
what the hell happened on ncis last tuesday I actually had about four versions of this but this was the most interesting.
This might just be the best time of the month to do this, so we'll go ahead and make this a feature. Ten strings out of 289 was a pretty good crop, I think. Oh, and for the record, the number one string was "Weapon Of Choice".